My heart feels heavy as it does every time this year. Mother’s Day — a day in which regrets suddenly surface and guilt can weigh heavy on a mother’s heart and soul — and expectations bring a little ache to the heart.
I love my sons and am so proud they are mine. I did my best raising them or at least the best I knew how or could manage given the circumstances. And still, I made mistakes and failed them in many ways. I have regrets — but what parent doesn’t?
Regrets of not doing more or being better in some way. But with God’s Grace I managed on through in those tough years and continue to lean on that Grace these days too.
People will say to me, as if to soften the ache, how much my boys love me. I believe that, I truly do.
And I hope and pray that they know how much I love them too. Perhaps that’s what causes my heart to ache every so slightly — did I do enough for my boys so that they know just how much I love them?
Thank goodness for God’s grace in my life — and I pray that my boys can grant me just a little bit of grace too for all my mess-ups and not-doing-enough.
My sons and me, what a happy day that was!
Happy Mother’s Day to all the beautiful women out there, who have loved unconditionally, without asking for anything in return. And who have and still are walking through trials and storms, and may be wondering if they are good enough as a mother. May God grant His Grace to you, and may we all learn to offer ourselves a little grace too.