Finding myself (or trying to see where I am going)…

As I sip my coffee on this gloomy, foggy morning, with the hum of the dryer and the dog snoring at my feet the only sound in the quiet house, I find myself feeling a bit lost.  Looking around me, I see all that needs to get done while contemplating all I would like to do, and I wonder, “who am I and where am I going?”

I often wonder these days if there isn’t something more I could or should be doing.  I let doubt and perhaps a twinge of guilt make me feel I’m not doing enough or doing anything of real importance or significance.  I let others’ comments affect how I feel about my life and leave me wondering if it is enough some days.  I’ve always been one to let others influence how I see myself.

But quieting the voices of all those critics and my own worse critic — my inner voice — has never been easy for me.  I want to please others.  I want to do the right thing.  I want to appear a certain way.  So, I’ve always tried to ‘find’ myself, I suppose, through others.

The reality is though, there is only one voice that matters.  There is really only one way to ‘find’ myself.  And there is only one true GPS to keep me from getting lost in the fogginess of my days.

When I seek His voice, when I look to Him, I can more easily see the direction for my life.  I may never see all the way to the end of the road or know exactly where this life will take me, but His direction gives me the confidence to know I am on the right road, going the right way.

California, USA
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight.” ~Proverbs 3:5-6

Over the past many years of my life I can clearly see now how my journey was laid out in front of me.  Yes, I could have made different choices which would have led to a different course in my life, yet no matter what I would have done differently, the Lord would still have ultimately been leading me down the road.

Have you ‘found’ yourself?  Do you know where you are going?

I believe that even in the fogginess days of our lives, when we have zero visibility of what lies ahead, we can still keep moving forward and find peace right where we are in this very moment.  We can ‘find’ ourselves in the Lord, when we choose to walk the road of life with Him directing our steps.

So, on this foggy morning as the clothes are drying, the vacuum begs to be turned on, and the dirty dishes fill the sink, I will pour another cup of coffee and spend some time ‘finding’ myself in His Word with the dog snoring contently at my feet.

May you find direction for your life and remember that when your visibility is obscured or the road takes a turn where you didn’t want to go, you can still have peace and joy if you choose it.




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